Reversing the Vicious Cycle of Doubt, Failure, and Shame

"That can't be it. You must be doing it wrong."

That's the inner monologue of the overwhelming majority of salespeople out there.

Every salesperson starts out having some kind of intuitive notion of what they need to do in order to sell their best. Then they promptly doubt it.

They talk themselves out of that intuition. They've convinced themselves that they can't possibly know what needs to be done, so they go and look for a template. They look for some set of skills or tactics that someone before them has used, and they use them.

Then they don't work.

At the very best, the seller ends up with mediocre results, because those templates aren't theirs. You can't just take someone else's words and use them. You need to sell like you.

Everybody I've talked to agrees with me and says they understand this, but few people are brave enough to stand up and actually do it. So this initial doubt leads to failure or (mediocrity at best), and it starts this vicious cycle.

As soon as you get less than stellar results with someone else's stuff, you go to find another set of templates, blaming yourself. Ultimately, you end up ashamed that you can't get the results that you know you're looking for, that you know you're capable of, despite finding and using all of the best practices out there.

You need to reverse that cycle. Stop doubting yourself and listen to that voice in your head that was right all along. Every top performer I've ever talked to has mentioned this as the turning point in their career. The truth is clear; you never sell better than when you #selllikeyou.

The Sell Like You ideology has three pillars: Belief, Execution, and Integrity.

You can't do anything well unless you believe in it. A high level of belief is rooted in integrity, and this is a concept a lot of people miss. Belief is more than just confidence. You don't gain it through study and repetition. You get it when there is true alignment between what you do, who you do it for, how you do it, and why.

When you have that alignment and you believe in what you do, you redefine selling for yourself. You get creative, you have fun, and you start to sell in ways that are genuine and authentic to you. Your prospects notice. You make better connections, create more opportunities with more productive tension, and it shows in your results. You close more deals more quickly and at higher margins.

Seeing this kind of success reaffirms that you can do this with your integrity intact. You stop worrying about being salesy or inauthentic, and your belief grows. This is the virtuous cycle that propels great salespeople to the top of their companies and careers.

Perhaps what is most interesting about this transition is that you learn the voice inside your head all those years ago was actually right all along. You know what to do. You know how to do it. Trust that intuition.

There's no reason you can't sell effectively in a way that feels right to you. It's actually the only way you'll reach your top potential.

"That sounds great, Jeff, but how?"

I help my clients do this all the time. The approach is pretty simple:

  • I remind them of the result they're trying to create and what needs to happen.

  • I work with them on how to execute in ways that will feel both effective and authentic.

  • Then I coach and reinforce those behaviors until they believe in them.

The result is a kick-ass sales culture that delivers world class results with high success rates, higher margins, and low turnover.

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