Assumption vs. Evidence

If I asked 100 salespeople why their best customers buy from them:

• 5 would actually know because they've asked

• 15 would guess correctly because they're sharp and attentive

• 80 would be completely shocked that it's more than just the bullet points on the website

I've been saying this for years, and nobody has ever disagreed with the sentiment.

Think about that for a second. 80% of salespeople are out there every day selling something they don't fully understand. Not the product, but the *reason* people buy it.

They have theories. They have assumptions. But they've never actually asked the question and listened to the real answer.

Everything is an assumption until you meet reality.

The Problem with Assumptions

You think you know why your best customers buy from you. You've got a story in your head about your service, your relationships, your responsiveness, your expertise.

But have you actually asked them?

Not in a survey. Not in a casual "how are we doing?" conversation. A real, vulnerable, specific conversation about why they chose you, why they stay, and what would make them leave.

Most salespeople haven't. They're operating on assumptions and dressing them up as knowledge.

The Validation Conversation

This is where assumption becomes evidence. You go to your best customers and ask.

It's uncomfortable. You're admitting you don't fully know. You're opening yourself up to answers you might not want to hear.

But that discomfort is exactly why it works.

The Four Benefits

These conversations are vital to replicable success, and there are four significant benefits of having them if you’re willing to let your guard down a bit.

1. They strengthen the relationship.

Vulnerable conversations deepen relationships. You're not pitching, you're asking to understand. That's rare, and customers notice.

When's the last time a vendor asked you, genuinely, why you work with them? It almost never happens, and when it does, it stands out.

2. They give you messaging to find more customers like them.

You stop guessing what matters and start *knowing*. That clarity becomes your go-to-market language.

Instead of leading with what you *think* resonates, you lead with what actually resonates, and in your customer's words, not yours.

3. They tell you what to keep doing and what to stop doing.

Not just for acquiring new customers, but for maintaining the best ones you already have.

You might discover that the thing you're most proud of isn't the thing they value most. Maybe something you take for granted is actually the reason they stay. Both are valuable insights.

4. They become the conduit for referrals and introductions.

You've earned the right to ask. And now you know exactly who you're looking for.

"Who else do you know who might benefit from what we do?" is a much easier question to answer when you've just had a real conversation about what those challenges are.

The Deeper Point

Your customers don't care about your product. They care about their priorities and the problems that get in the way of accomplishing them.

Most salespeople are drinking their own Kool-Aid. They’re fanatical about what they sell, eager to talk about features and capabilities and differentiators.

But that's not where the truth lives.

The truth lives in your customer's world. What they're up against. What they think about first thing in the morning. What would make their life easier.

Those truths are not self-evident. You have to go get them.

The Work

I've been teaching a framework called **The 5 Questions for Killer Customer Conversations** for years. They're simple. They're powerful. And 95% of salespeople will never ask them.

1. “Why did you choose to do business with us?”

This seems obvious, but most reps have never directly asked. They have theories. They have assumptions. But they've never heard the answer straight from the customer's mouth.

2. “Can you please be more specific?”

This is the linchpin question. Whatever they said in response to question one, it's probably surface-level. Your job is to model vulnerability here. Ask for a story. Ask for an example. Get them past _"you guys are great"_ to the actual reasons.

3. “Why do you continue to do business with us?”

This is different from question one, and that difference matters. The reasons people start buying from you are often different from the reasons they keep buying from you.

Pay close attention to what you hear, and especially to what you don’t. Bringing donuts on the 2nd and 4th Fridays of the month may feel like a big factor, but they’re far less likely to be needle-movers than you think.

4. “Do you know anybody who might appreciate the same value?”

You've just had a vulnerable, meaningful conversation. You've learned what they actually value. There's never been a better time to ask for help.

5. “Would you be willing to introduce us?”

An introduction is worth 10x more than a referral. A referral is a name. An introduction is a warm handoff with social proof built in.

Other questions worth having in your back pocket:

- “What would make you consider leaving?”

- “What do we do that you don't see from others?”

- “If you were describing us to a peer, what would you say?”

The validation conversation isn't a one-time event. It's a practice. The best salespeople do it regularly not because they doubt themselves, but because they know the truth is always worth finding.

The Truth Is Undefeated

Your customer's truth is the most valuable thing you can know as a salesperson.

When you have it, everything gets easier. Your messaging sharpens. Your targeting improves. Your confidence grows because you're not guessing anymore.

When you don't have it, you're just hoping your assumptions are right.

We know hope isn’t a strategy. Have the guts to learn the real truth.

*This is Part 2 of a series on doing the hard work up front that makes selling easier. Next up: Integrate